March to the Nuke 600K Ride Report

Anne Pokocky, Eli Brettler, Steve Rheault, Glen Steen, Ken Jobba and ride organizer Isabelle Sheardown started the “March to the Nuke” on Saturday July 2nd, 2005 under clear skies with a nip in the air and a gentle, easterly breeze which aided their rides through to Fergus. Early wind assistance was misleading, as our riders struggled against headwinds for most of this brevet.

For Steve, both his previous 600s were group rides with 4 people and each took precisely 39:25 to complete. Steve wondered how he would do solo, and thought that this would be a good ride to try a long dose of solitude. Steve forged ahead of Anne, Eli and Steve. Glen & Ken caught and passed Steve before Hockley Rd.

By the time Glen & Ken departed Fergus, the wind direction shifted, and they battled headwinds north to Markland where Glen's “bottom” issues first became apparent. More about this later.

It was on the road to Markland that Glen & Ken caught up to a young Mennonite man in work pants with britches and heavy work boots riding a very respectable Louis Garneau road bike. He was pedaling strongly and they rode together for a brief time before the young Mennonite turned off just in advance of CR14 road construction. This extremely long 10km section of torn-up road actually had the “Use at Your Own Risk” sign. Of special note were the last 1000 metres that were bone rattling. Shortly after this dirt section, Glen & Ken spied a rider up ahead that they battled headwinds to reel in. It was none other than their Mennonite cyclist friend who had smartly taken a detour. Wonder what this young gentleman could do on a bike with proper cycling shorts and shoes!

Glen & Ken enjoyed the ride through Scone to Chesly where they stopped for a brief lunch of whole-wheat toast, peanut butter and jam. Leaving for Kincardine, the winds had shifted to out of the west. Glen & Ken spelled each other off to make good time to the Nuclear site. They stopped at the Tim's in Kincardine for a bagel and an iced cappuccino and couldn't resist putting their heads down for a further 15 minute catnap. Leaving Kincardine, they enjoyed a tail wind traveling east to Holyrood and then south to Benmiller. Challenging themselves, they made Goderich’s Bedford Hotel as the last rays of sunshine blazed on the tops of tall trees.

Keith McEwen was waiting at the street level for Glen & Ken. He escorted them upstairs for a shower, change of clothes, and 30 winks. They re-fuelled with plates of pasta in the hotel’s restaurant, and departed Goderich at 11:30pm just as Steve was arriving.

On Saturday, Steve covered 355 kms in less than 18 hours. This included stopping for a half hour to help a family that rolled their car into a cornfield just in front of him after Marsville. It also included talking at length with the master wheel builder in Scone who is a legend with most of the Port Huron chapter members. Steve had been on the phone with him just last week and now was riding past his shop in Scone just out of Chesley. Small world, puny province! The master wheel builder confirmed that yes indeed, the gaping wheel swallowing expansion joints of the Cornwall bridge on the Placid ride had dealt a fatal blow to his back rim. The wheel builder spoke at great length of tension ranges, spoke lengths and lacing patterns. Secretly, Steve was relieved just not to be riding into the wind like he had been since Fergus. Steve rode on feeling better that his rear rim had been pronounced as dead by a guru and here it was going to actually do its final ride before the trash can, a 600 no less. Thump… thump… thump… thump… but only when the roads were smooth enough

In Goderich, Steve quickly showered, stocked up and was ever thankful for Keith’s wonderful drop bag service since he now had clean clothes on. Steve declared that he hates putting leg and arm warmers on sticky limbs. With less than 250kms to go, Steve had visions of somehow being in the ranks of those strong riders in Radonneurs Ontario that have done a sub 30-hour 600. He figured all he had to do was keep the pace up and the stops minimal. Oh yes!!! This was going to be his fast 600! Perhaps this should actually count as a ride induced hallucination.

The Weather Network forecast called for an overnight low of 16C, and our intrepid riders, Glen & Ken, wondered about the need for arm and leg warmers. They donned them anyway, in addition to polyester undershirts, cycling jerseys plus wind vests. These were not nearly enough to ward off the extreme chill brought on by a stunningly clear night sky resulting in loss of any ground heat built up through the day. Their view of the Milky Way was stupendous, but progress was slow as any speed increased the wind chill. Glen & Ken passed through Brussels a few minutes before 2am. Then stopped in Newton for 30 minutes to catch some sleep on benches at a storefront. Between moments dozing off, they woke up shivering. No choice but to ride on with no coffee shop to warm-up in till hours away.

As they were rolling into Crosshill, they heard the birds begin to chirp as the first glimpses of the dawning day appeared. They made their way through Heidelburg, St. Jacobs, Conestogo before the sun crested the eastern horizon. A beautiful morning if it wasn't so awfully cold! Finally a Tim's in Elora where they were able to warm-up with mugs of coffee.

On Sunday, Steve covered only 245 kms and took well over 18 hours. So much for a 30h ride illusion! This included an attempted 5-minute pause in Brussells. Rather, he got up 4 hours later after a shake/cramp-a-thon on the cold concrete steps of an overly lit library entrance. This somehow might have qualified for a snooze. Resuming his ride, Steve crashed off his bike even before getting to the red blinking light that kept him constantly reminded of how much time he was wasting there, and how it was actually was supposed to be a fairly mild 11C outside. He physically shook the bike’s handlebars for the next half hour - tremble city. Thankfully the roads were empty. Finally he started to warm up even though he was still wearing everything he had brought (a vest, two jackets, leg and arm warmers). Steve’s knee had bothered him a bit on the Placid 600 and a bit Saturday, but Sunday it felt really bad and it had company. The Achilles below on the left side was wretched. As Steve warmed up, the headwinds started up again. He was hurting and the near constant smell of liquid cattle manure and long straight stretches into the wind were starting to rob his nay hopes for a quick finish. He kept plugging along as best he could. Outside of Elora with maybe 125 to go, the sag wagon passed with Eli, Anne and Isabelle. Isabelle had been having problems with her Achilles as well. Adding the near constant headwinds, the three of them were done.

Why does a gentle 10 kph breeze feel like a small hurricane when it’s in the face of a cyclist? Why do winds so weak that they can’t hold kites aloft make us suffer? Why did our riders have to have a wind from the east on Sunday? Why? Why was the near steady stream of horse drawn buggies that were rushing to church, just before Heidelberg, traveling west so that Steve could not draft them? What time does church start if you don’t have clocks? Why was the only eastward buggy traveling at only 15kph? Why does 32 feel 4 times as fast on a bicycle as 16? Why does 40 feel twice as fast as 32 but 80 doesn’t feel four times as fast as 40? Why are we always going either faster or slower than 20 but never exactly 20? Steve wondered if he would end up “39:25”ing this 600 like his others? For that matter, would he even finish? Did he even want to finish? Would finishing cause him some injury that would hamper his Gold Rush efforts later in the month? Why were so many oncoming cars pulling into his lane to pass other cars, forcing him off the road? It happened 3x and that was 3x too many.

Rolling along the south bank of the Grand River toward Fergus, Ken observed that Glen was standing on the pedals more than usual. They talked about maintaining a 25km/h pace to break 30h for the ride. They found their way onto the Elora-Cataract trail and tried to maintain their pace. Glen had to increasingly resort to standing on the pedals. It became evident to Glen that he was not going to be able to maintain the pace with the level of butt discomfort that he was suffering. Glen urged Ken to go on ahead to attempt a sub-30h finishing time.

With some reluctance, Ken dropped down on his aero bars leaving Glen to ride and suffer alone. Ken was figuring that time would be tight, and pressed on. He was motivated by a silent commitment to Glen to give it his all for the sub-30h goal.

Why was the penultimate 50 km stretch so darned tough? There were 38 kms of the Elora-Cataract rail trail with many very unpredictable surfaces. Every road crossing seemed a hazard because every gate had these nasty turns you either made or crashed way down in a steep ditch. The rail trail seemed never ending.

Leaving the rail trail, our riders encountered an incline on Mississauga Rd north to Alton. Then there were some truly vicious rollers after Alton going north on Main St. Poor Glen succumbed to backside ride injuries in this section. He had done the worst parts; this wasn’t fair!

Attempting to beat 30 hours, Ken’s last major obstacle was a miserable 10-minute wait in-line at the Tim Horton's in Orangeville. With the clock ticking, the wait seemed to take forever but he needed to refill water bottles and get a caffeine fix.

Crouched low on aero bars in his best time trial form, Ken made very good speed on the mostly downhill run on the Hockley Valley Road from Orangeville to Airport Rd. Continuing east past Airport Road, the trees sheltered him from the wind into the Hockley Village. Smelling the finish line, he scaled the last climb just east of the village on CR#1. His last 10km north into Alliston was assisted by a strong wind right to the finish line which Ken crossed at 11:45am. He’d done it!

After Orangeville, everything finally kicked in gear for Steve. That 40 metre climb that looms right after Hockley seemed a quick climb and after turning down the townline, he also took full advantage of the tailwind all the way back to the Alliston Sobey’s and that hamburger at Wendy’s that he had coveted all weekend. Steve completed March to the Nuke solo in 36h 30m!!!

If you’ve endured this far into this post ride dribble, Steve would like you to read about his animal tales. Late Saturday afternoon, Steve encountered a couple of cattle on the highway that he scrambled into opposing ditches by riding right between them. On the Cataract-Elora rail trail, there were a couple of horses up the trail. The rider on the left appeared to look back at Steve and then moved his horse to the right beside the other rider. This was good since Steve didn’t want to startle them and was just about to make his intentions known. As he went to ride by on the left, one horse bolted 90 degrees to cover the entire left side of the path. Steve tucked his helmet down and just cleared under the horse’s head and bridle narrowly avoiding a quick descent into a deep ditch. Later, he found a little store just off the trail and bought enough Gatorade to finish the ride and an ice cream treat. While Steve was sitting out front in a semi-comatose state, a rather large hummingbird (maybe a 4” long body) came in rather close and totally checked him out. Must have been his eau-de-sucrose.

The riders extend their thanks to Isabelle and Keith for hosting an excellent brevet. Keith’s hospitality in Goderich was marvelous. Honourable recognition to Anne, Eli and Isabelle for doing as well as they did on this nearly all headwind ride… and after each had completed a major effort (Placid 600 or Michigan 24h’s) only a couple of weeks earlier. Kudos to Steve on a great solo effort! Congrats to Ken for achieving the sub-30h ‘superman’ finish. Ken says that as much as he might feel exhilarated by his finishing time, he was more disappointed that Glen had to abandon so close to the end. He extends his gratitude to Glen for getting him to commit to ride through the night, shared pulls against the wind, and encouragement to go on ahead to break the 30h mark. We hope Glen heals quickly!